Surprised Obama awarded NBA Rookie of the Year Honors

Obama has been on winning streak since being awarded Nobel Peace Prize

Opponents say one of the knocks on Obama's game is that he drives to his right too much.

WASHINGTON D.C. –  President Obama said yesterday that he was “somewhat surprised and deeply humbled” by the decision of the National Basketball Association to name him recipient of the Eddie Gottlieb Trophy as the 2009-10 T-Mobile NBA Rookie of the Year. This is the fifty second time the President has been awarded or honored in the past five days.

A panel of 120 sportswriters and broadcasters throughout the United States and Canada unanimously decided Obama should receive the award. Sources close to the panel say the foresight displayed by the Nobel Peace Prize Committee inspired them to preemptively give Obama the award before the 09-10 season started.

At last night’s impromptu ceremony NBA Commissioner David Stern said, “Obama will make a fine Rookie of the Year, and the fact he has never played in the NBA should only serve as an inspirational example of just how far hoping for change can carry someone.”

2K 10 will feature all 30 NBA team, plus one additional team consisting of only Obamas.

Before the ink could dry on the headlines of Obama’s Rookie of the Year award, there was word that the President had received yet another honor. This time he was chosen to grace the cover of the popular video game NBA 2K10. According to a press release issued by 2K Sports, the company felt potential customers would be drawn in by Obama’s message. Meaning they hope his presence on the cover would persuade gamers to change their preference for the rival basketball game, EA’s NBA Live.

While the thought of being so highly regarded and adored by the world over might seem appealing, it does not come without a price. As a practical matter Obama’s mantle is rumored to be on the verge of collapse under the weight of the countless trophies, medals, and awards etc. he has received over the past couple of days. While the mantle space shortage at the White House is troublesome, it pales in comparison to the shortage of time on Obama’s calender for all of the award shows and photo shoots. Since last Friday alone, the President has attended thirty eight awards ceremonies in his honor all over the world.

The President’s absence has led White House staffers to jokingly refer to Air Force 1 as the “White House in the sky,” and its pilot, Frank Norris, has been renamed “Trophy Czar.” One person at the White House is not laughing though, as Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel has been skeptical of most of the President’s awards. He has wondered aloud if all of the President’s unjustifiable recognition is really part of a clever right wing ploy to devalue the Nobel Peace Prize, or are all these no-name award committees and organizations just trying to ride on the Peace Prize’s coat tails. Others have said the Obama trophy-train is too hot right now not to give him any and every conceivable award. While the real reason behind all of Obama’s recent accolades is up for debate, few will disagree on the illegitimacy of most of the following awards:

Obama was shocked to learn that one of Micheal Jackson's last wishes was to have his face replaced by the President's on every new copy of his breakout album 'Off the Wall.'

POTUS = Stoner of the Year.

Obama awarded Nobel Peace Prize for his ‘peaceful approach’ to war

Obama honored for making wars in Iraq and Afghanistan seem more peaceful

WASHINGTON D.C.  –  A shocked Obama woke up this morning to the news he had been awarded the prestigious Nobel Peace Prize. Obama was chosen for his “peaceful approach” to the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan said the Nobel Peace Prize election committee.

Retired General Bressler displays the hand written invitation he received to attend the Afghanistan Resolution mixer.

The committee stated that “Obama has created a new climate in international politics. Peaceful wars are now the preferred instrument for resolving even the most difficult of international conflicts. Only very rarely has a person to the same extent as Obama been so peaceful in the handling of wars on multiple fronts.” The committee went on to add, “In the past leaders of countries have always conducted their wars in a rude, confrontational, and hostile manner. Obama, on the other hand, has been very cordial and polite in the management of his wars.”

For example, Obama has been very hospitable in the way he has handled the topic of sending more troops to Afghanistan. In lieu of formal meetings, all of the military’s top personnel attended a series of dinner parties, socials, and mixers at the White House in the hopes of coming to a resolution on the issue. Each invitation sent to invitees were hand written in calligraphy by Obama himself, and sealed with a wax stamp.